


Connie Drabbles

by Deathsmallcaps



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, Canon Divergence, Citrine - Freeform, Connie with all the gems that were listed on the wikia page by March 14 2018, Drabble, F/F, F/M, FullMetal Alchemist - Freeform, Humor, alphabet drabble, also a fusion counts of two or more of a gem, also on that list there was ‘citrine’ because they were mentioned once, as of, basically everything went wrong and they had to get hostile, because Connie gets WD’s powers she and Steven can have a hybrid baby, handwavey magic, just only blue and yellow come down to take spinel away, may do another one of these someday, moat a re a hundred words but some borrowed words from others, posting three a day, reunited, so that’s why there is a gem that was never pictured but that jade fusion doesn’t make an appearance, some of it is definitely dumb but some I hope also inspires the feels, that was when I first started writing this, the last one was definitely inspired by, the movie events can basically be canon towards this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-01
Updated: 2019-10-10
Packaged: 2020-11-09 09:31:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 10
Words: 3,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20851223
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Deathsmallcaps/pseuds/Deathsmallcaps
Summary: 26+4  100 word drabbles about Connie interacting with the gems. Written mostly in 2018, so canon divergent AU.A mix of goofy, sweet and angsty. Starts out more goofy, ends more angsty.(It’s the alphabet with an extra Q, V, X & Z)





	1. A B C

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! So basically this is all past the current events of the show (minus Spinel because when I wrote this I didn’t know she existed. I may write a sequel to this idk). Some character deaths, lots of skipping around time wise. Connie has two daughters, Roz with Steven, and Priya is adopted. That’s all you need to know going in. (Sorry I’m new, that’s why there’s awkward notes.) I hope you enjoy!!!

Amazon  
Connie approached Pearl, holding out her phone with an article on the screen. “Pearl, have you heard of Wonder Woman?” she asked.

Pearl smiled. “Why yes, I have. She’s a made-up Amazon from comic books, correct?” When Connie nodded affirmatively, Pearl continued, musing, “I saw the movie with Steven. She is honestly a lot like the daughter of Hyppolyta.

Connie stared at her mentor. “You mean the Amazons were real?!”

Black  
“Why does my hair turn a pinky brown in the summer when yours stays black?” Steven asked, playing with Connie’s hair as they watched the clouds float by.

She shrugged. “Maybe the pink has something to do with your mother on your end. My best guess for myself is that I wear a lot of hats outside - I just don’t wear them around you and the gems because something will inevitably happen and I’ll either lose it or need to take it off.”

“Oh, okay,” Steven said, and then smiled.

Call  
“Oh my God, Garnet!” Connie shrieked into the phone. Pearl was standing close by, looking confused and a little jealous as to why she had to hand her phone to Garnet, and why she couldn’t know what’s going on.

“Yes?” Garnet was too tired to try and predict how this call would go. She had just fought off five confused recently uncorrupted Jaspers on a solo mission, so she was more taciturn than usual. 

“Am I pregnant?!”

Garnet jolted to her feet, her eyes suddenly unfocusing as she looked at the future. 

“Yes.” She said tearfully.

Pearl and Connie simultaneously started sobbing, in happiness or sadness, Garnet did not know.


	2. D E F

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo I didn’t realize that you could do chapter summaries? Oh well.  
D is really goofy   
E is weird and it has a citrine that is mentioned exactly once in the whole show (see my tags)  
F is goofy/sweet? (I liked this one so much I took words off the other ones.)  
A Drabble with goofiness, another with sweetness, and a sadder one seems to be the trend so far. Weirdness will drop off pretty soon.

Dollar  
“Hey Connie, can I have a dollar?” Amethyst begged, getting down on her knees, shaking her fists and fluttering her enlarged eyelashes.

“Sure...” Connie replied, her voice trailing off to convey her confusion. As soon as she handed the gem a dollar, Amethyst spindashed away, coming back a couple hours later. In a helicopter.

She took everyone in town up in it a couple times before explaining how she got it. “I’ve been saving for years, and I only needed one more dollar to get the first available-to-the-public solar powered helicopter. Thanks Connie, by the way!” 

Connie continued gaping.

Eagle  
The Citrine felt uncomfortable as she walked into the zoo, trailing closely behind the war hero Connie Maheswaren-Universe, and her children. 

But Roz, the one who had popped her bubble and landed her in this foreign millennia, without a Diamond Authority to fight for, had insisted that she get used to the new world around her.

“What’s that, Mama?”, asked Priya, pulling on Connie’s shirt, and pointing at a beautifully strange creature, the likes The Citrine had only seen once before, on a jungle moon. This creature was much more majestic and smaller, though.

Connie shrugged. “An eagle.”

Food   
Rhodonite hadn’t split in centuries, her components stuck together. However, that changed when they got to Earth. To celebrate the Off-Colors finally making it to Beach City, the Crystal Gems (including Peridot, Lapis and Connie) had all made their favorite foods, and had instructed the Off-Colors on how to make a digestive system and taste buds. 

Rhodonite politely sampled all of them, only truly enjoying Crystal Gem Pearl’s tea until she reached Connie’s dish.

It was covered in small, shriveled plants, and added an unfamiliar tang to the air. She took a small bite, and in half a second -

“Oooh! This is wonderful!”

“BLAGH! HNNRK! PTAH!”

Off-Color Ruby wiped her mouth. “I think I’ll stick to the tea, thanks. That’s too hot for me.”

Off-Color Pearl, meanwhile, was stuffing her face.

From then on, on the anniversary of Rhodonite’s wedding, they’d split and during dinner Pearl would go stuff her face with fire salt sprinkled onto Connie’s dishes with Amethyst and Garnet’s Ruby, while Ruby would sip tea with Crystal Gem Pearl and Garnet’s Sapphire.


	3. G H I

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> G was written when I was obsessed with Twisted Sister, so bear with me.
> 
> H is sad if you liked Aquamarine, and maybe even if you didn’t.
> 
> I is bittersweet.

Guitar  
Connie, whenever she felt particularly nasty, but didn’t want to take it out on someone she liked, would pop Emerald’s bubble and play metal music and just watch the gem squirm. 

She never played one particular song, though, because she wanted to see how long it would take for Emerald to quote the music video in some way. To her twisted delight, Emerald got it nearly word for word. 

One day, she trashed her containment cell, and said, “All right Missy. What do you think you’re doing? You call this a room? This is a pigsty. I want you to straighten up this area, Now! You are a disgusting slob! Stand up straight, tuck in that shirt, adjust that belt buckle, tie those shoes!” 

Connie purposely did the exact opposite of what Emerald demanded and showed her the band’s name. 

“Twisted Sister?! What is that? Wipe that smile off your face. Do you understand?! What is that?! A Twisted Sister pin?! On your uniform?! What kind of thing are you?! You’re worthless and weak. You do nothing, you are nothing, you sit in here all day playing that sick, twisted, electric twanger?! I directed a platoon and you carry that, That, THAT, GUITAR!”

Connie shot her the middle finger as she destabilized Emerald’s form and to this day, cannot hear ‘We’re Not Gonna Take It’ without giggling nefariously. 

Home  
What am I without my status on Homeworld? thought Aquamarine, and moved her face so that when Connie brought her sword down for an overhead death strike, it sliced clean through her gem. 

Connie, never knowing that Aquamarine was the cause of her own death, felt guilty and almost never used that strike again. 

Indeed  
The first to recognize the spark between Carnelian and Skinny-J was Connie, and Carnelian thinks it would have never gotten any farther had it not been for the human girl she would later call friend. Now, with her wedding imminent, Carnelian is sad Connie isn’t here.

As she stands at the month old sapling that grew from Connie’s ashes, next to Steven’s much older tree, she waters the roots with her tears. 

Finally, Carnelian gets up, and pulls out her dress from her gem. “Indeed,” She muses, “I wanted you to walk me down the aisle.”


	4. J K L

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> J is kind of a prequel to I.  
K is just goofy - I imagine Squaridot to be like Peridot without the character development.  
L - We find out who Priya’s Mom is. And do y’all think chocolate-covered jalepeños are real?

Justice  
Skinny Jasper isn’t afraid of death or punishment, not anymore. However, she is afraid that Carnelian is going to say no when she asked to become her wife. 

When talking Connie about this, the centuries-old woman, beautiful with all her laugh and smile lines adorning her face, chuckled and said, “Sweetie, you would be doing the universe a justice by asking her. We’ve been waiting far too long. She’s going to say yes.”

King  
Squaridot was having the time of her life, barely holding onto the speedboat’s bow. “I’m the King of the World!” she screeched.

Connie, who was driving the speedboat, was thankful for the earplugs she was wearing, and decided to annoy the little gremlin by correcting her. “It’s queen, not king! When you use female pronouns, I mean!”

Squaridot rolled her eyes and continued her screeching.

Lady  
Holly Blue Agate wasn’t bad, once Connie got to know her. However, she was stupid. 

Apparently, after deciding she wanted to pass off her gem just like the illustrious Pink Diamond did, she got knocked up by the first guy to call her ‘Lady’ and wanted to leave her baby to Connie, since she was already raising a human-gem hybrid. 

And now the Agate was at Connie’s front door at 1AM, saying she was tired, needed a place to stay and she was craving chocolate-covered jalapeños.

Sighing, she let the 8-month pregnant gem in and went to find chocolate-covered jalapeños.


	5. M N O

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> M is probably bittersweet, and kind of explains how Roz got a gem without Steven giving up his form for her.
> 
> N is exactly how I think the cluster would react to such news.
> 
> O is kind of goofy. I love sassy Connie

Meek  
When it was discovered that White Diamond, after being defeated, had somehow passed on her powers to Connie, she immediately decided to fuse with Steven. 

Together, Stevonnie and the diamonds randomly picked out a bubble and sang the corruption out of a jasper monster. The crystal gems had gathered to watch, and when the gem finalized her form, Bismuth started to cry.

“Biggs, is that you?!” She screeched, and ran over to the disoriented jasper. 

Instead of answering, the gem merely hugged Bismuth. It was adorable.

Connie and Steven unfused, and walked over to greet the old crystal gem.

News  
Connie borrowed Peridot’s drill (after learning about all of its buttons and safety features, of course) and went down to visit The Cluster.

“I thought you ought to hear the news,” she said to them. “Steven is dead.”

She burst into tears as the whole Earth shook with grief.

Old  
“I haven’t fused with someone else for centuries,” Fluorite said nervously, ponderously. She was still a slow speaker.

“You’ve known the Rutiles for years, you’ll be fine!” Steven said reassuringly to the old fusion.  
Meanwhile, in another room.

“Calm down, goddamnit! You’ll be fine! Your fusion after the marriage ceremony will be beautiful, and you’re going to be happy!” After calming down a bit herself, Connie assisted the Rutiles in no longer pulling their hair and made them do some breathing techniques.

(Later, at the reception.)

Connie strode over to Steven and poked his chest. “Don’t ever make me calm down a bride on her wedding day again.”


	6. P Q Q

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> P - I headcanon Padparadscha can see anything she wants in the past, so she’s basically a scryer, and I think that’s actually very powerful. I know the show utilized it in the episode before Jungle Moon but not to its full potential.  
Q - I haven’t played any of the SU games, but from what I saw of Hessonite, she was a meme. So this one had a mind of its own.  
Q - Stabbing warning.

Pizza  
White Pearl and Padparadscha were sharing a slice of pepperoni. Or rather, their fusion was. They weren’t sure about her name, but she enjoyed being herself. Especially since she had her pearl back in her eye while fused. 

But as she was licking her fingers, a vision overtook her and the surprise caused her to split.   
White Pearl, a little annoyed to find her gem back in her navel, a stinging sensation burning her face as she regrew her scar tissue, asked, “Why did we unfuse? I thought we had that under control?”

Padparadscha was grinning ear to ear, and after her moment to process what was asked, she said, “Oh! Well, Steven and Connie just had their first kiss!” 

They both shrieked happily. 

Quotes  
Hessonite loved memes. She had mastered all the Fortnite dances, spent hours on Imgur, and often was scouring rumblr, looking for funny conversations. So when she started giving out quotes for the stock market, everyone was confused. 

Eventually, Connie gave up on trying to figure out what the stock market had to do with memes by herself, so she asked Hessonite about it. 

Hessonite told her such a complicated conspiracy about the stock market controlling memes that she herself became a meme when Connie took a picture of her explaining her theories.

Hessonite cried when she found out she was viral. “I have ascended!”

Queen  
Green Diamond strutted over to the prone form of White Diamond, Stevonnie’s sword hovering over her gem and ready to poof.

The other gems were there, and were barely able to hold her down. 

Green Diamond set her foot upon White Diamond’s gem. “I am the queen now.” She declared, and promptly stabbed White with a heel.


	7. R S T

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> R is simple.  
S is sassy - I didn’t really like Green Zircon in the show but she keeps popping up in my fan works sooo  
T - Punch in the gut. Death mentions.  
Also, ‘blah’ is internal thoughts because I’m still figuring stuff out.

Red  
“I don’t think red is your color,” sighed Connie. 

Topaz slumped. “I just want to wear something other than yellow or brown. Is that too much to ask?” 

Connie shrugged. Topaz despaired for a little while. 

Eventually, “How about this?” Topaz held up a black pleather jacket and slipped it on and looked in the mirror. She grinned. “I look great!”

‘You look like a bee’. “Awesome! I’m glad you like it. Let’s go check out.”

When they got back, literally all of the gems complemented Topaz on her new look.

Connie liked helping gems acclimatize to Earth. But there was no denying that sometimes they were just weird.

Super  
Green Zircon had eventually become a Crystal Gem. She just didn’t feel appreciated by the Diamond Authority, not even when it was “reorganized”. She was a super divorce lawyer, and was able to amass a small fortune within her first two years of living on Earth (it helped that she didn’t really know what to spend her money on, or what it even was really for.)

When Connie got remarried, Green Zircon slips her a business card. “I’ll go ‘pro bono’ for you.” She says after taking one look at the other bride.

Target  
It was baby Roz’s first birthday in two days, and Connie’s in eight, so after a long visit with her sisters Nephrite thinks she should get some presents. So after asking around, she finds a Target and scrounges up a couple dollars. 

When she arrives in Beach City and gives the presents to Connie, the woman thanks her with tears in her eyes.

“We weren’t going to celebrate,” She sniffles, “because Steven just died. Broken neck.” And burst into tears. Nephrite joined in once the shock wore off.


	8. U V V

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> U is silly. I am using ‘blah’ for thoughts again.  
V is sad. Warning for grief, manslaughter and sort of murder.  
V is also silly. Really just done for a pun.

Unemployment  
Yellow Pearl has been enjoying not working. Green Diamond had laid her off because there wasn’t enough credits to pay her a regular salary. 

However, no money meant she couldn’t enjoy the whole earth experience. Her unemployment was getting on her nerves. So when Connie suggested she go work for Mr. Smiley, who had just had a heart attack from exhaustion, she happily agreed. 

She made good money, had six hours off EVERYDAY, and Mr. Smiley, whom she admired, appreciated everything she did.

‘Earth jobs are far superior to working for a Diamond.’

Vans  
Jasper went to Homeworld, even after learning that Steven was Pink Diamond. She just needed to get lost in the system again, be treated normally and fight things. Unfortunately, there was no need for a military on the planet anymore.

So she returned to Earth and became a builder. She carried ten times the load the human workers did, and felt valued and special for a while. It even felt ... nice. No connections to her past life.

So when she saw Steven, driving along in his van, singing along to the radio, she was triggered, and let go of the wheel of the truck she was using to bring more lumber to the construction site.

Her gem got cracked, a little, and his was fine. His neck had gotten broken, though. Steven died soon after impact.

‘I killed my Diamond.’

So when Connie came after her one dark night as she lay under the stars, weeping, she just let herself die.

Vikings  
When Blue Zircon first heard of Renaissance Fairs, she had thought, for some reason, that it had been referencing the beginning of Era 2, or perhaps even 3. Needless to say, when she attended one with Connie and Steven, she was very surprised to see what it actually was.

But after meeting a couple Vikings, she got so excited by their dress and culture that she poofed herself after much research, came back in traditional garb, and now lived as one.

Suffice to say, all Priya has to do is call up her Auntie B-Zirc (a pun Blue Zircon had come up with herself after learning she was a berserker) whenever she had to do an assignment on Norse culture. 

They both loved the Rory Rickdan’s Valhalla series.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> W is sad, but ultimately optimistic   
X 1 is kind of creepy and explains how Connie found out about her own powers  
X 2 starts out weird and is a bit of wish fulfillment for me. Even with all the explanations about her youth, I still don’t like Rose Quartz.
> 
> Don’t worry, there’ll be less sad stuff for the last chapter. I want to thank you all for the Kudos, and a special shout out to DSDUKE for leaving so many comments. I really appreciate it!

Weather  
Storms across the world happened when Steven died. Lapis nearly sunk Jersey. But one day, after Connie had found Lapis’s location, they suddenly stopped. People who were unaware of the real source thanked their gods.

Lapis got help.

Xenobiotic  
“I have no idea.” The doctor said as an explanation to why there were xenobiotic pieces of carbon found around Connie’s body.

Dr. Maheswaren glared at the man, but he just chuckled, clearly unaware that she was also a medical doctor.

After his chuckle, the man mused, “You know, these pebbles look like a white diamond or something. Maybe you could sell or wear ’em; there’s enough for a small fortune.”

Connie went as pale as a sheet. Or rather, a White Diamond.

Xolo (dog)  
A decade after Steven died, his gem, so lovingly placed on a pillow in his old room, suddenly started glowing. Garnet, who had a vision only minutes before, gathered everyone she could to stand around it.

At first, it went through the shapes of Pink Diamond, then Rose Quartz, and then for a final, brief moment, Steven, whose flesh had been cremated away soon after his death. 

Then it started bending over, looking kind of corrupted. 

When the light was finished, a Xolo was standing there. 

“What the hell?!” Shrieked everyone. Then the dog shapeshifted into Rose Quartz. 

Rose Quartz did finger guns at Amethyst. “I told you if I came back I’m come back as a xolo dog. Now, where’s Steven? How were you able to separate us?” She grinned like her son used to. 

Everyone else just looked exasperated and astounded. 

Except for Pearl. She was having a panic attack and had to go find her girlfriend.

And Connie was pressing a sword to the pink gem’s neck. “You have a lot of explaining to do!” She thundered as her eyes glowed white.


	10. Y Z Z

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Y is sweet  
Z 1 is a Fruits Basket reference that was written before I found out that a remake was coming out (and is now out!!!)  
Z 2 is a reference to Full Metal Alchemist and is sad. (And a slight one to Connie swap!)
> 
> The end. Thank you guys for all the support!!!

Yahoo  
“Yahoo,” breathed Blue Pearl as Connie and everyone else on the galaxy’s highest rollercoaster screamed. 

“It’s okay! You can be louder next time.” Connie said after they got off. 

Blue Pearl, who hadn’t considered upping her volume despite leaving the Diamond’s service decades ago, seemed to seriously consider this. 

The next time they visited the amusement park, her joyous shriek echoes for miles around. 

Zodiac  
“Now, Connie, as a mostly-human being who grew up in the 21rst century, what would you say to watching some anime with Amethyst and me?” Peridot asked.

Connie humored her. “Well, as one of those creatures, I say yes, though I call dibs on picking out which one we watch first.”

The little green alien stuck her hand out, and they shook, Mr. Tumnus style.

Connie grinned and said, “Let’s watch Fruits Basket. It has the Chinese Zodiac in it and Steven really loved it when we were younger.”

“What’s a zodiac?”

+1 Zombie  
It wasn’t until Connie had been divorced from Neimaat for several years and widowed by Steven for twenty when she realized that with White Diamond’s powers, she could possibly bring him back. 

So that night, when Priya and Roz were finally okay with Connie trying, she made a pink diamond and called Steven’s spirit with it.

A body came, but not a soul. “Just a damn Zombie,” she sobbed as she made the replication decompose.


End file.
